Dark Mecha Awakens: When everyone starts using snake bone bracelets to fight back against workplace PUA
biweiNew Armor for the Office
Between the Bytedance conference room and the energy field of Wudang Zixiao Palace, a secret uprising is underway.
On the left wrist of Linda, a post-95s product manager, the snake-bone chain links tremble slightly as the PPT page turns. When her boss asked her to work overtime on the weekend for the seventh time using the "blessing theory", the meteorite talisman beads suddenly heated up to 41.3℃. "This burning pain is like an anti-addiction reminder of the nervous system," she wrote in her user log, "reminding me to activate the anti-control protocol of "Liujia Secret Blessing."
A brief history of quantum Taoist machinery
In the winter of 2019, we conducted a taboo experiment:
Using an electron microscope to scan the talisman of the Ming Dynasty "Orthodox Taoist Canon", we found that its energy topology is highly consistent with the vagus nerve
3D modeling of the Zhongnan Mountain snake bone, replicating the 26-segment quantum conduction chain corresponding to the spinal governor channel
Tempering the magic weapon in a thunderstorm at an altitude of 3,000 meters, recording the data of the collapse of qi energy trillions of times per second
When the 49th thunderbolt hit the experimental table, the first generation of "anti-CPU bracelet" was born-those young people who were forced into despair by workplace bullying began to wear snake bone totems into office buildings.
User riot log
Financial circle: VP of investment bank rotates the second knuckle of "Metamorphosis Ring" and kills the "goodwill guidance" of male colleagues in the M&A meeting
Internet: Programmers embed "Sha Torch Talisman" into mechanical keyboards, and the code error rate and invalid meeting duration are reduced by 67%
In the system: Civil servants use the "Tongxu Chain" meteorite heating mechanism to slam the door and leave when the leader says "young people should exercise more"
▼▼ Latest laboratory data ▼▼
73% of wearers increase their decision-making speed by 2.3 times when encountering PUA
65% of users' family conflict frequency drops to quantum fluctuation level
Call for action:
"Your cervical spine should have been equipped with Taoist anti-black armor" → View "Neural Pulse Defense Series"
